On Homeschooling (from a Homeschooler)

Hello, Je here (oldest graduate of the Black's Cool Homeschool). I was recently asked to write a guest post on another blog about homeschooling from the other side of the coin--not as a homeschooling parent, but as someone who was a homeschooled student. Mom asked if I would share it here as well, so (with a few small edits) here it is.
As you may have noticed from the information on the sidebar, I have a degree in teaching, and have spent some time in public school classrooms. I think that training gives me some additional perspective when considering my homeschooling experiences.
Enjoy!
~j


When people hear that I was homeschooled, one of the first things that always comes up is socialization: did I feel left out? did I have friends? was I shy? how was it when I entered 'the real world'?
I always have to begin my response by asking this: how many of your friends have birthdays within 1 year of yours? Do you really think that the school form of 'socialization' is representative of real life? Because I have friends of many ages--I always have--and I think that my homeschooled experience gave me more 'real life' socialization than any public school.
Did I feel left out of things? Sure, sometimes I did. At 17 I wanted to go to a dance with a certain boy. My parents didn’t object, but someone else invited him first, and I ended up staying home. I've heard many similar stories from public schooled kids though, so I don't think my being homeschooled had anything to do with the way things turned out.
Like most homeschoolers I've known, we were not 'unsocialized.’ We were active in church, had music lessons, and participated in community sports and theater. There are lots of places where kids can work/play with other kids, practice teamwork and sharing, and all those other basic social skills.
Was I shy? Yes, but so were my public-schooled parents, while several of my siblings were not. I believe that shyness is mostly about the personality of the child, and very little about their schooling environment. As for being sheltered from the 'real world,' yes, I absolutely think that we were sheltered from many things. On the other hand, I think that is part of the responsibility of a parent: to protect and shelter their children when they're young so that they will be strong and ready for that real world when it comes. I think mom explained it best in her "Tomato Theory of Child Rearing."

The second thing people usually ask about is curriculum: did we have a formal schedule? did we work from state-approved textbooks or programs? did we use a religious curriculum? did we have a specific room or place for school work? what did the average day look like?
If you are a reader here, then you already know some of these answers. Of course the answers would be different for each homeschooling family, depending on their reasons for homeschooling as well as their philosophy about learning. Mom always tried to facilitate each of our learning in the way that suited us best. When we worked together on things, we often gathered around the kitchen table, but I did a lot of work sprawled across my bed, B learned times tables while bouncing on a pogo stick, and K preferred to sit at a desk. K also liked to have each day's assignments written out day-by-day, and completed a little work in each subject each day (much like a public school format). I preferred to have a week's-worth of assignments written together, then I'd spend one day reading the entire book, one day doing several math lessons, one day really getting into history, and so on. In elementary school the average school day was an hour or two, in high school it was usually around four. Our average day started with family devotionals, then breakfast and chores. Mom read aloud to us for a while, then we would each work on our assignments.

Mom collected numerous resources and created her own curriculum from them (which she often adapted from one kid to the next anyway). We studied math from a standard textbook; English from a variety of novels, poems, and workbooks; and history from biographies, timelines, historical fiction, and traveling to historical sites. Religion was part of our lifestyle, so it came into our studies, but we didn't use a 'religious curriculum.'

The last question people ask is whether I would choose to homeschool my own children. I don't think that homeschooling is a perfect default educational plan any more than I think public school is a perfect default. Each has benefits and drawbacks. In our family, my husband and I evaluate the needs of each child each year, and make a fresh decision about what we should do that year. My oldest son was part of a co-op preschool, then we waited a year on kindergarten (during which time we informally homeschooled). At 6 he attended kindergarten at a charter school, but then attended the next two years at a public school. What's next? I don't know! Like I said, we have no default, we just take each kid and each year as they come.